DarkestSelf

"Am I"

Giving you the space that you need,

Am I someone whose worth your time?

Loving you the way I've never loved before,

Am I someone who you can call your own?

Giving you every inch of my heart,

Am I everything you asked for?

Screaming inside when you're gone,

Did I say something to push you away?

Watching you when you're sleeping ...

Looking so precious and peaceful,

Am I getting too close?

Isolating myself from you ...

Feeling as though you don't want me near,

Do you still want me?

Comforting you when you've had a bad day ....

Taking my hands acting as if they are strange,

Should I leave you alone?

Curled up together in bed ....

Moving closer to you,

Am I not what you expected?

Confused in the words you say,

Confused in the signs that you give

Am I just wasting your time?

The days you are gone,

I begin to pack my things

Leaving behind what we have,

Are you going to watch me leave?

Watching from my mirror

I see the expression on your face,

Did you even care that I left?

Tears start to roll down my face

So alone,

Am I wasting my tears?

Posted in My Poetry

"Bleeding Hell"

This distorted pain has bled its way through me

Crushing my insides,

Tearing them apart completely

My mouth has opened ....

But nothing has come out

Help me escape this hell

Gasping for the air I fail to breathe

My thoughts have now diminished

Hiding seems to not be an option

Searching for the answers that don't exist,

My mind has gone in circles

Whispering quietly to myself,

Convincing myself everything will be alright

Tears that fall down my cheek,

The pain that shoots through my body

There's not much left for me to do

The temperature is rising,

My body begins to sweat

Taking in what I can,

I trust no one

Crossing my fingers ...

Hoping to live through this

Screaming to be let free

Feeling something from underneath me,

Looking down to see a puddle of blood,

My blood . . . . .

My wounds have opened themselves

Surrounding myself in my own blood

I dread this outcome

This bleeding hell is what I can't escape

This uncontrolling feeling that rushes through my veins

I dwell on something that is unknown

Take me away ...

Take me far away

My bleeding hell

Posted in My Poetry